Respect - The Cornerstone of "us"

I have been thinking of penning down my thoughts on the topic for a long time now, only the fear that I may not be able to do justice to it, put brakes on my writing for a while.

Relationships include parents, love, siblings, friends and every person you interact with. Though, in this post I am primarily talking about your partner - the person you love. The moment you talk to someone, it creates an 'us'; the life of this 'us' varies from a few seconds to a lifetime. What ensures that all these 'us' exist and prosper in our world? I believe it is because of the feeling called "Respect".

Respect - The Cornerstone of  'us' i.e. relationships. [Cornerstone - a stone placed at the corner of a building to mark the beginning of construction]. If this cornerstone is removed, it damages the very base of the building and if the foundation is damaged, it puts the building in danger. The same thing happens to a relationship when Respect is lost.

If you respect the other person, it creates an atmosphere where other emotions can breathe like - love, like, patience or even hate. The relations especially the long term ones begin with respect. Respect is an essential and foremost ingredient in the curry of relationships. It decides the way you treat your partner, the value you give to his/her presence and opinions, the affect he/she has on your thought process....it guides your feelings. How can you love a person when you can't respect him/her as a human being? Hence, many a relationships have died due to lack of mutual respect.

But, it is not just enough to respect the other person, but also important that your self respect remains intact. (And there is a fine line between self respect and ego). Self respect means drawing a line at the point till which you would adjust to ensure that the relationship survives and you are happy being a part of it. What feelings can live when you believe you are worthless and are put down at every instance?

Relationships last longer when both sides make an effort and respect the other person, his/her feelings, emotions, opinions, values and beliefs. Together they can reach a consensus which acts as a manure in the field of a relationship. In this scenario the relationship will endure all odds and other feelings will coexist. So, stick & fight for your relationship but if you feel you can't respect your partner anymore, let it go. Else, the relationship becomes a parasite on your emotions and well being. Remember, all other feelings have a chance to come back if respect stays, else even love can't hold you both together.

“Relationships-of all kinds-are like sand held in your hand. Held loosely, with an open hand, the sand remains where it is. The minute you close your hand and squeeze tightly to hold on, the sand trickles through your fingers. You may hold onto some of it, but most will be spilled. A relationship is like that. Held loosely, with respect and freedom for the other person, it is likely to remain intact. But hold too tightly, too possessively, and the relationship slips away and is lost.”     Author Unknown